Friday, 31 January 2014

One month down, eleven to go

Photo copyright Nick Wallis
What is this stuff, again?
Look, a picture of me holding a glass of neat vodka. Only joking. It's water. Something I still don't get enough of. One day last week every single thing I drank contained caffeine, so I'm cutting down on that, now, too. There's always something.

Well, I've lasted a month without booze, and it's time to say goodbye to most of my fellow travellers who will be launching themselves off the back of the Dry January wagon with an Olympic-standard vengeance into a large vat of something well-deserved.

Good for them.

The main thing I've noticed about not drinking, and not having any prospect of drinking for a very long time is that you don't get too thrilled about things.

I used to be enthusiastic about each forthcoming weekend, and the various injustices of the world I may or may not put to rights with different groups of friends. At the weekend, that enthusiasm would get magnified, largely in direct proportion to the amount of alcohol imbibed.

Now that joyous unpredictability has been removed from my weekly prospects, I find myself becoming more contained, reserved, and yes, sober about everything.

This is not necessarily a bad thing. It's just a new thing. Knowing the weekend is going to provide little in the way of escape from the daily hustle and general drudgery forces you to appreciate your work and your family more. It's all there is.



1) It makes me pathetically grateful to see the amount of money people have contributed going steadily upwards. It also serves as a salutary reminder of my likely bankruptcy if I do fall off the wagon. If you can spare a fiver, or even two quid or whatever the minimum donation is, please find it in your heart to do so, gawd bless yer guvnor, luv a duck, ect ect…

2) One donor (hello Matt!) suggested I write a blog post on how I have motivated myself to stop drinking and generally be more healthy. I've taken up with a gym and over the last few months got myself down to the lowest weight of my adult life.

I like the idea of accepting commissions, so in my next post, sponsored by Matt, I will reveal the secret of losing weight, cutting out drinking and getting fit. If you like, you can be the sponsor of the post after that.

I will write about anything that takes your fancy. All you have to do is make a donation, communicate your chosen subject matter to me and a minimum four hundred words will be yours.

That's got to be a good deal, especially if you only donate a fiver.

My keyboard is primed and ready. I await your patronage with obsequious servility.

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